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| Funny text messages |
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20% of the population
is now drinking coffee, 60% is having sex, 19%
is watching television
and one yokel is now holding his mobile in his
hand
BEEB! Send this message to 5 of your friends and
you will have unbelieveble sex tonight!
If you break this chain, you'll never have
multiple orgasm again!
Braindetector
activated, calibrating, now
searching.........still searching......get a
good grip of your mobile....
still searching.......no brains found.
HALLO, this is your mobile. There is no
particular problem. I just wanted to leave your
pocket,
want the smell is unbearable!!!
How would you like your egg for breakfast....
hard-boiled or impregnated?
In case of fire read this
message.....................................
I SAID IN CASE OF FIRE YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!
Mobile sex: push 1 for oral, 2 for anal, 3 for
normal, 4 for a trio, 5 for SM and for
everything ...
dial my number!
One out of four people is a chinese. If your
father, your mother and your brother are not
Chinese,
it must be you.
This is the telephone terrorist team. While
receiving this message a virus will be
activated.
This virus should have infected your mobile by
now. Your mobile will be disabled, unless you
are ugly.
This sms can only be read by someone SEXY:...try
again...again...maybe you are just not sexy?.
..one more time...hey don't force it ugly!!!
We will now upgrade your brain.......Please
wait........Searching.......Searching.......Still
searching........
Sorry, no brain found !!!
You got STYLE... You got SEX-APPEAL... You got
the BRAINS... and you sure as hell got the
BODY....
WAIT!!!!!...SORRY....wrong number
Your provider adjusted his rates. The rate is
determined by the length of your genitalia,
the shorter they are, the less you pay. You can
telephone for free from now on!
At dis moment in time 10 million people r having
sex.5 million people r drinking coffee.
100 million people r sleeping & 1 stupid fool is
reading my text!pass on
Police text message jokes
I'm @ the police station now been done 4 drink
driving.Urine sample was positive so I nicked
the sample.
they r now doin me 4 taking the piss
im at the police
station.The police caught me & filed a case
against me "possession of good looks"
.i'm doomed! i need someone ugly 2 bail me
out-so hurry up!
i hereby place u
under arrest 4 violating code 0569 -
distracting public with ur xtreme good looks
&sex appeal.remain silent & report 2 my bedroom
If a big fat man creeps into your bedroom one
night and stuffs you into a bag,
Then do not worry 'cause I told Santa I wanted
you for christmas!
Smilin is infexous
u catch it lik d flu.wen sum1 smild at me 2day i
startd smilin
2.now im infectd iv sent it thru dis txt.so now ur smiling who wil it go2
next?
Dear friend! Do you take me 2 b your lawful text
mate.2 have & 2 hold.
4 dirty quotes or saucy jokes.in text messaging
& in poor signal.til low battery do us part?
girls are like phones. we like to be held and
talked too- but if u press the wrong button u'll
be disconnected!
A good friend is like a good bra... hard 2 find-
comfortable- supportive- prevents u from
falling-
holds u tight- and is always close 2 ur heart!
THE NHS REGRETS TO INFORM U THAT UR BIRTH WAS AN
ACCIDENT.
PLEASE REPORT TO UR NEAREST HOSPITAL TO BE PUT
DOWN.
WE APOLOGISE 4 ANY INCONVINIENCE
Merry Christmas, Enjoy New Year, Happy Easter,
Good luck on Valentines,
Spooky Halloween & Happy Birthday Now bug off
and don't annoy me for the next 12 months!!!!
why do i text u? its my choice its my way of
sayin dat i remembr u. why do i remembr u?
il neva know its not my choice its my hearts.
Last nite I lay in bed looking at the stars- the
beautiful sky and the endless horizon....&
suddenly I thought...
where on earth is my roof?
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